I Can Deal With It
by Yuu Yamane
Summary: Allen knew he was going to die anyway or have to submit, so why not at least make it worth his time and effort. YULLEN! Rated T for character death and Kanda's cussing at the end!


**I Can Deal With It**

**Hello everyone, this here is a simple one-shot about my favorite pairing! Yullen! Though, unfortunately it will be a sad story, cause I'm not really good at coming up with something happy. I'm a failure for that, really I am. That's besides the point though. Well without further ado let us go on with the story. I decided I will also add the ending up here too, I don't want to ruin the sadness at the end. So please rate and review! Thanks!**

**Disclaimer: I do now, and will never own D- Gray Man. If I did then it would probably be the end of the world. Really it would, we would have a zombie apocalypse and everything!**

The white-haired boy sat there. Why was he continuing to suffer he wondered. Why was he born? Was there always a plan for him to suffer this way? Everyone, excluding him, had someone to return to. In the end it would always be this way. He could deal with it and he did, with a broken mask. Even though I have no reason to go on, I will still protect people, until I lose to the 14th.

"What are you thinking about, Allen" asked Lenalee. Allen wanted to protect her as best as he could and so he did the most logical thing he could think of and lied to her.

"Nothing important, really just thinking about picking up another mission" Allen said, he wanted her to stay as pure as possible. He knew he was going to die anyway, so why make it any harder on the girl, he mused. He wouldn't live for long, either his body would kill him or the 14th would take over. Neither were very favorable, but he could deal with it.

"Go rest for a while" Lenalee finally said. She knew he was tired. She could see it in his face, but she let it go as that he wasn't sleeping enough. She was right, but there was always a reason to why he didn't sleep right. Either he was up being sick, or the 14th was showing him horrible nightmares. neither helped him at all, but he could deal with it and did.

"I'll go sleep for an hour or so" he said. He knew Lenalee too well, she would fight with him until he finally agreed. So to save himself from argument he went to his room and laid down. He was so tired, but he could deal with it._Just a little longer._His body said. More like the 14th. He decided then, he wouldn't die without fighting. After all Mana had told him to keep walking. So even though both outcomes were inevitable he would fight and keep walking. With that thought he went to sleep. Not even an hour had passed when he shot up out of bed, with another nightmare. Soon body, he said. He knew, but he could deal with it. He got dressed and walked down to Komui with a note he had written earlier.

"How can I help you, Allen-kun?" Komui asked. "I would like a mission, are there any available?" Allen asked. Komui moved around some stacks of paper.

"All of these are for more than one person, I will have to send someone along" Komui stated after looking through all the papers.

"That's fine" Allen said. Secretly he was hoping that he would be going with the long- haired samurai. He loved the man, even though he would never admit it. That was something that was written in that letter.

"How about I send Kanda with you?" Komui said finally. Komui knew that he would need someone strong for this mission.

"That's fine" he said and took his leave. His next assignment was to go and get his things packed. He didn't bother with much, for he knew that this would probably be his last mission. He could deal with it. Komui already knew about Allen's problems and sent him anyway. Not that Allen would complain. Kanda would learn from that note what Allen felt and at the point that's all that really mattered. Once he finished packing he headed downstairs to the sat there looking as impatient as ever though, Allen decided he wouldn't have it any other way.

"Finally ready, Moyashi?" Kanda said. "My names, Allen" he said. His voice was really calm though. He was too tired to fight. Kanda already hated him so it really didn't matter if he fought or not.

"Well, we should leave Kanda" Allen said finally. Kanda would probably ignore him anyway. Not that it bothered him, no there was no time for it. He was just happy with Kanda's presence. He wouldn't talk to Allen, because that was out of his character. No he would totally ignore his existence. Allen could deal with it, and did with fake smiles. There were many things he could deal with, for only being 16. He dealt with the akuma, the people around him, Kanda, the Earl, the Noah, and the 14th and yet it seemed that with in that all there was no longer the presence of a boy. No, he was something that was broken. They never really knew him, he wasn't someone that was always happy like he lead others to believe. No he was just a clown He could deal with that, and did.

"Lets go" Kanda said as they finally reached their destination. Allen wouldn't talk, no he knew if he had replied he would tell Kanda everything. Not that Kanda would car any, but that wasn't the point. He remembered that he had placed the note with some of Kanda's things so that it could be found.

As soon as they reached the forest the next day, they were swarmed with a horde of akuma. Not that this would be a problem for Kanda. For Allen though, it was different. By the time there fight was finished he was exhausted. Not that he would say anything. After the fight they continued on, Allen knew, this fight would be his last. He could deal with it, and did by realizing why he lived. Kanda being the jerk he was decided to quicken the pace. All Allen could do was keep up, or attempt to anyway. _Soon_They had reached a clearing in the middle of the forest and there sat a rock that was glowing green. That's it, but then Allen noticed. Kanda being impatient went to grab the innocence. Allen being faster shielded Kanda's body. It was a trap, Road hade candles set at a far distance and once you went to grab the innocence it would activate and then pierce through you.

"Allen-kun, you weren't supposed to get hit with it" Road came out and said.

"It doesn't matter, Road. I did what I had to, and I will kill you as well" Allen said. He didn't want Kanda to stay and see this. _When the time comes, please, kill me. I don't want to cause hurt anyone. Since you hate me, it won't be a problem. _

"Kanda, go ahead and go. I will catch up with you" Allen said. He knew it was a lie, yes he would die here. Well after he killed Road, that was. _Keep walking, Allen. _Soon my quest for walking forward will be done. Kanda took the innocence, and left with it. He usually wasn't one to leave a fight, but he left Allen alone. Allen could deal with this. He was used to this, for he had always been alone to begin with. He activated his innocence and ran at Road with the sword part of his innocence. After what felt like ever she had been defeated. He fell to his knees, his vision was clouded, With tears, he didn't know. It might have been rain. _Allen, keep going. _No, I'm too tired. I want to rest now. _You can rest now, Allen. You did not kill the Earl, but you gave that person that strength to do so. So rest peacefully, and I will see you soon. _Kanda had probably found the note and thought that Allen was an idiot. He could deal with that. He also was probably disgusted with Allen. To love another man was frowned upon. I can finally see you again, Mana. He closed his eyes. He realized then he was afraid, it was taking too long. He wanted it to be quick, so he didn't have time to regret it. Not that he did, but he didn't like the eery silence. He was going to die, but it was worth it. His body was going numb, finally everything was shutting down. Mana, I'm coming. _Welcome back, I missed you, Allen._With that Allen Walker died. Not even fifteen minutes passed and a person walked up to his body.

"Damn it, fucking Moyashi!" he was mad, he had confessed his love and now Allen was dead. He didn't get to tell him how he felt.

"I loved you too, Allen" was what he last said. He picked up the body and headed back to the order. Months later, the exorcist side had won the war. Kanda had fallen with people who died, but he was the one who killed the Earl.

"I'm finally coming to get you, Allen" was his last words as he fell to his death.


End file.
